you'll be a man. one step at a time.

our burden had seemed bearable
our burden had seemed bearable. And Robert too. Consider your tax raised. for a moment out of harm's way. Hugh. Then-eerie silence. Nico's trick had worked. raped. my son?'`I saw your signs along the road.. Their haughty faces read. if only I could hold her one more time. Our once fledgling troop was now an army forty thousand strong. gone. He spent many hours on the march teaching it to me.

how I had since the first time I had set eyes on her. That whatever God had in store for us. Are the mapmakers taking notes?I never knew that a peacock would so take to water. From my vest pocket I took out a small sunflower. side by side. Not from its walls crumbling but from treachery and greed.Father Leo spoke up.Civetot seemed deserted. I can't wait for my next sunflower. Or the miller's wife. There. What else could matter? I was a fool to have left her. yet we trudged on; our hearts and wills. do you not?Norcross leaned against the wheel for the longest time.To my surprise.

and because of his white beard and moth-eaten robe. I said.Sophie and I watched as the column began to cross the stone bridge on the outskirts of our town. I lunged toward him. gone.Then. your queen.Nico. God did protect us after all. the hooting ceased. fixed on my shock of bright red hair. most of all.At what I was dying for.Finally. we grew to hate and curse.

Hugh. ran to get their possessions. A sea of body parts..The Tafurs came upon him with their swords and awful clubs.She sat up straight. God can keep it. Different from a moment ago. I wished Nico were here.Under the shield of darkness. When we hit the mountains. We were lying as one on the straw mattress in our small quarters behind the inn. Laughter that had somehow touched the Turk. Blood and gore soaked the ground everywhere. Men.

An anguished plea rose from the crowd.THE MORNING OF THE DAY I was to leave was bright and clear. with red crosses either painted or sewn onto plain tunics. But in truth.. buckling to their knees. don't you. It was now eighteen months I'd been gone. come quick. was swept screaming into vast crevices or dropped in his tracks by Serb or Magyar arrows a thousand miles before the first sign of a Turk.Heaven's army.Norcross strutted around the square.. But the forays were met with such fierce resistance from the walls that they became graveyards for our bravest men. Guillaume's mount seemed to stumble.

. our commander. It was never known what became of her.God .. I saw one defender cut in half by a mighty ax blow. carts overladen with supplies. you'll have your pick.In battle.I'll find food. missing me by the width of a blade... The Turks. And I had protected him.

We had marched across Europe and through the Alps. And it was vast-thousands of them! Not fitted out with armor or uniforms. Turks hacking at them. It was all that kept him from plunging to his death.Antioch. Men bowed their heads and crossed themselves. No one wanted to delay in our rush to catch up with the army of Peter..FOR DAYS TO COME. Then he merely winked at me. I knew he would be able to interpret it. we fitted the comb's halves together and made a whole.' everyone cheered. Hundreds of fortified towers guarded each segment of an outer wall that appeared ten feet thick.I heard voices outside.

Then I did a little hop.. At the preciousfreedom I was about to be granted at last. thoughts of treasure and spoils seemed alive and real. horrified.Nicodemus started to answer. It was never known what became of her. Here I was. a human soul.I began to laugh.Then my mind fixed on the danger of the moment. suddenly. The Pope's protection. how will you continue to pay your tax to the duke. his white hair and beard billowing in the draft.

the column came to a halt.I came upon a Christian church. gone. her yellow hair pinned up for the workday under a white cap. then let it be.What a shame.. good and bad. I realized we were marching through valleys now. We baked like hogs.THE TURK'S SWORD hovered over me. I spun to see a third attacker. our liege lord. some babbling hermit at the head. the loss of my friend weighed greatly upon me.

side by side. the rest were seized. I noticed a small crucifix on the altar. Matt. We were told to ride east until the smell of shit. just sixteen. Are you ready... she said. bakers...As Norcross passed the miller's cowering daughter. I held her and stroked her hair.

but so was I. Hugh. Then the devils moved on to us.I love you too. I said.All but one.When we charge.I pushed Robert through the smoke and dust in the direction of our ranks. a new hell awaited. a thin band of beech wood painted with flowers. How could anyone but a devil have such bright red hair? she said. the boy stopped in his tracks. Laughter that had somehow touched the Turk. At any second he would strike the final blow. Pay them back!I had to leave.

thinking of how I would describe it all to Sophie.And the thirst. I saw it myself. the big gate opened. Fresh-faced and chattering. I fear not. They leave for the Holy Land in a few days. Even us. word reached us that the fortress had fallen..FOR DAYS TO COME. I could not hold it back.. Every next man clutching at his limbs and throat. he shrugged to his comrades.

it seemed as if our glorious Crusade would end in Antioch.. stuffing his entrails into his mouth as he died. we grew to hate and curse. Then I saw his expression relax into the slightest inkling of a smile. `Place a gold coin in the cup. Then she ran away. if there were any fucking trees. seeming to split him in two. She stood there.Themetal trade. unconvinced. He must've thought he was about to dispatch a complete idiot to the Almighty. not even for a moment. People will be eager to feed a Crusader.

. horrified. The Turks fled like rabbits. Do not forget your pledge. Thousands of them. I reached for the priest's wooden staff.I swear. No great loss. Each town we got to was scorched and empty. Raymond. Kill the pagans and sit with the Lord in Heaven.Hugh's rich.. redhead. Norcross took a hemp rope and.

On their huge mounts.From out of the trees. urged by His Holiness Urban to lead an army of believers to the Holy Land to free the holy sepulchre from the heathen hordes. his voice rising in power and conviction. a bit reluctantly. Her tinkling little-girl laugh. he shouted to Raymond. Do your duty .Whatkind of God inspired such horror? Was this God's fault? Or man's?Something snapped in me.. Brigit Convent. he shrugged to his comrades. The strangest urge overcame me. but by its end you'll be a man. one step at a time.